WHAT WERE YOU THINKING MCDONALDS???

So in an effort to turn around flagging sales McDonalds is changing its menu AND a beloved character too.  It seems they have decided to the take the benign cartoon Hamburglar of our youth; you know the one who sounds like a turkey and looks like Alfred E. Newman's brother who went a little too far with a bottle of QT.  

And replace him with this guy:

Look kids!! A fella who looks like he might not only take your dollar value meal, but he might also throw you in the back of his windowless van, rape you and leave you for dead.  Brilliant marketing, replace your cartoon mascot with the physical embodiment of the man that mothers tell their children to stay away from.  So, yeah, smooth move Ex-Lax.  I have to put my face into my palm and spend the evening wondering "What were the pitches that they turned down?"  Was there one where Ronald was now a PIMP and Grimace managed the girls while Mayor McCheese takes kickbacks and looks the other way?  And there are brilliant people who can't find a decent job in marketing....sigh.  

(Oh and spell check doesn't recognize Hamburglar.  Where have YOU been spell check?  Get with the times)