This month there has been a lot of carrying on by men with this Movember movement. The Dallas Stars are doing it, Damian Lewis is doing it, even Willie Geist has a sad patchy beard going on, all in an effort to raise money for men’s health issues, specifically: mental health, obesity and cancer. All bad things right? Here’s the thing, it is a completely unnecessary endeavor. All of the above has been sorted out already. “By whom” you ask?................. By the women in your life of course! We’ve been telling you this stuff for ages: “Go to the gym, eat more greens, go to the doctor, tell me about your feelings…” That’s it, problem solved.
So instead of Movember, I propose “Listen to your Wife and Mother Month”. No need for a scratchy beard or additional funds. “But what if I don’t have a wife or a mother? Who do I turn to then?” Simple, just ask any woman on the street. She will be more than happy to tell you how to manage your health. She will also be happy to provide helpful hints on how to dress, what to watch and how to properly conduct your life in general. There is no facet of you life too small for us to have an opinion as to how it could be done better. We’re just awesome that way. If you had consulted us first we could have saved you a lot of trouble.
*This post may or may not have been sponsored by Schick Quatro®, a stylish and ergonomic razor with 4 titanium-coated blades for a comfortable, smooth shave and Sam’s wife Jean who has had it with the beard.